Toss Your Balls Around

  I've been seeing a lot of videos of recent despicable occurrences at baseball games, namely those involve catching a ball in the stands. The worst of which was a grown ass woman taking the ball out of a little girls hands and cheering as though she won the world series, as the little girl walked back to her seat pouting.

   It's outrageous and hard to believe this crap really happens. I always try to have more faith in humanity, but at times like this I find it waning. Nearly as bad, if you continue watching that video, she accepts a high five from another grown ass fan, who I can only hope didn't see her steal the ball. And now, as I watch my new home town team, The Tampa Bay Rays, I see a man nearly knock a young woman over to try to steal a caught ball.

  I'll simply say this: I've always wanted to catch a ball at a game. Always. But if you one day see me catch a ball, keep watching, because you'll then see me turn toward the closest and youngest child and hand it over. I don't care how much you think the game means to you but that ball will be nothing but a cool memory. To a kid, it will be their world. Be a decent person and make a kids decade.

  More on my recent move to follow at a later date/time.

I Got Moves

Sorry for the prolonged absence. For those that have not yet heard, my wife and I picked up and moved to Florida.

Moving in as I type which is a recipe for disaster.

More to come shortly.

if(harder == better): mattyJoe = faster + stronger else: print("Epic Fail")

So...the last time I posted I was about 310 lbs. That means I was pretty big. Like smallish house big. It just so happens that I'm significantly lighter nowadays, and this makes me happy.

For Reference

Lots of people have asked me how I've done it, so in celebration of my first run since infinity without an asthma attack, I'll post some details.

Firstly, my gorgeous wife, in a brilliant scheme to get me to realize how absurdly out of control I was, started logging her calories with an app by the name of LoseIt. Being the annoyingly curious individual that I am, I of course had to inquire. Shortly after that I started using the app myself. My first week went less than smooth. The first day, I managed to double my very generous calorie budget.

Budget Issues

The terrifying thing is, that one day was a pretty accurate portrayal of my daily eating habits. It's a miracle I wasn't large enough to merit my own zip code and classification as a land mass. The point being, the largest problem I had was my poor estimation of my daily caloric intake. I thought I was eating healthy, that I was doing a great job and was shortly to drop astronomical amounts of weight. I was right about the last part, but the first was purely delusional.

Using the app, I shortly gained control of my eating habits. For those that use similar situations and continue to watch your girth increase, I have some decent advice. Overestimate the quantity of food you consume and underestimate the amount of exercise you've performed. I wish I could say that this would give you some wiggle room, but in actuality, it's far more likely that you have been cheating yourself subconsciously because hard numbers and red bars make you feel like the fat kid in dodgeball again. Like you are picking on yourself.

So, for me it was pretty smooth sailing- until I exited the realm of morbid obesity at least. I dropped on average 7 lbs a week, without becoming anemic or faint. I know this seems off but I'm sure that this was not unhealthy weight loss. I truly feel that this was just a byproduct of morbid obesity losing its battle against reasonable eating habits. When you weigh 310 lbs and suddenly begin eating like a human rather than a medium sized farm animal, you cease to be a medium sized farm animal with the quickness. 

Once I was down to a reasonable, non life threatening weight, it became considerably more difficult to shed the pounds. Where I was able to eat nearly 3K calories a few months ago, my budget is now 2K. I feel that for most people this would be reasonable but my eating habits are somewhat restricted due to my job and my strong affinity for shitty food. Side note: You can eat whatever the hell you want, but if you feel like having 4 donuts for lunch, I hope you are cool with skipping breakfast and dinner. Now it was time for a new thing: Exercise (ugh...exercise).

At first, I thought I could do the diet without exercise, but once the budget dropped, I found myself consistently going over. While it's ok to go over a day here or there, the key to loss lies in being at a calorie deficit come 23:59 Sunday. However, when you begin to go over every day, you need to fix things. One day, when I went over by 200 calories, rather than let it slide and try to eat less the next day, I decided to get off my slightly less fat ass and go for a walk. It worked.

In addition to walking, I tried padding the budget with as much unlogged activity as I could conveniently fit in. I park on the roof of the parking garage and take the stairs down and up, no matter how tired I am. I park in the farthest possible spot of the shopping center, which also saves me frustration and fuel from searching for parking. And while I do log it, when I get downtime at work, instead of sitting in the ambulance working on a sweet case of Deep Vein Thrombosis, I speed walk. I try to hit an hour on slower days and just go as long as possible on busy days.

A few weeks later, I find myself writing this post having gone for my first real run in forevertimes. Tonight I set out for a long walk with my podcasts and pup to keep me company. About 5 minutes into the walk, we had to jog to cross the street and I just didn't stop. It's not much for most, but for any fat guy, jogging 2 miles in 20 minutes is a reach. Suffice it to say, I consider it a huge achievement. And the crazy thing is...I fucking loved it! Word on the street is that running is way easier on your body when you don't have your own gravitational pull. At first I had some rough breathing and leg soreness, but I just kept going, and next thing I knew, the sweet sounds of The Hex Grid (an amazing nerd music podcast brought to you by Nerdy Show) were pushing me along. I didn't want to stop. 

Having talked to my friend John Biffar, a marathonist and overall master of skinny-person activities, about getting started in the whole not sitting on my ass thing, I heeded his advice to listen to the body when my right hip started to feel a bit sore. I'm aware that these things will happen while my body gets used to moving for more than 5 minutes a day so I'm not concerned. Matter of fact, I have more energy post run than I did before and I'm pumped to go for a run tomorrow. 

Another side note: Dogs don't get tired and that's bullshit. Humans have to constantly work on improvement to get their cardio up but my dog, having been sedentary since birth, ran the two miles without so much as sticking her tongue out or considering slowing down. It's a pleasant surprise but I had no idea that something with such little legs could be such a great running partner. 

Emma as a wee pup. Not much bigger now.

Well, that's pretty much it. I hope it helps inform someone who needs it, or at least let's everyone know that I haven't found a miracle fat fighting drug. I'll include some links to the things I've mentioned at the bottom. If you have comments or questions not pertaining to my profound overuse of run-on sentences, I'd love to read them below. 

I wan't to be the Tony Stark kinda nerd, not the Comic Book Guy kinda nerd.

LoseIt: You can find the apps on IOS and Android app stores, but the website is http://www.loseit.com/

Nerdy Show: http://nerdyshow.com/

The Hex Grid: http://nerdyshow.com/category/shows/the-hex-grid/

Returning to The Religion I Never Left

I hope this will help others understand my feelings about religion. It also serves to let people know what I have been up to lately. In it's original form, this was a post to www.reddit.com/r/judaism

Hello friends,

I was hoping for some advice. I was raised by a conservative secular family, if there is such a thing. When we attended Temple, it was conservative egalitarian temple, but we only did so on the high holidays. Being that religion was so minor a part in my life, when I came into manhood, I strayed from the path.

For a time, I became agnostic. Then, for a short time, I thought I was an atheist. Sometime late in my college years, I became very scientific, and found that science does not contradict religion. To the contrary, it supports it. The collective force of energy that ties us all together, that cannot be created nor destroyed, is the manifestation of G-D to me. I formed what I thought to be my own religion, without ceremonies or prayer, but a religion of understanding.

At 26, I became a Freemason (I'm 28 now). Although Freemasonry isn't a religion, it requires that it's members believe in one everlasting G-D. Additionally, while it does not force it, it asks it's members to be religious, and to find their unity with G-D, by whatever name you call him. This made me look into myself and helped me feel a unity, a bond with Hashem.

This past week, my uncle Al passed away. This is nothing to mourn as he was 99, completely mentally with it, and embraced the ending of his life. I'm sad he no longer walks this earth, but he has impacted my life tremendously. My wife (not Jewish but very supportive) and I attended the funeral, and returned to the family's home to sit Shiva. They being modern orthodox, performed the home services, which my grandmother urged me to take part in. I did, but did not understand a word. The men walked to Shoul to observe Shabbos, while the rest of the family prepared the home. I went with them.

While not understanding it all, the beauty of this all, the services and the family time and Shabbos observation over dinner, filled me with joy and desire. My uncle Al, his following, and the family he loved, have inspired me to finally find my place in Judaism.

What I need now, is advice on how to do it and where to start.

I must say, I still consider myself a Diest. I feel that all religions are the representation of the one true G-D, and that his love is best understood differently by different cultures. This is why I can still find beauty in a Catholic Mass, or in the reading of the Koran. But I find that I best feel his love when being a practicing Jew.

I also don't feel G-D is a sentient being, but a universal force. But the only way for our minds to align ourselves properly and communicate this force is through dedicated prayer. I know this might put me at odds with some, but if you consider it, we are told Hashem is everywhere and in everything. In being created in His image, I feel that we truly are, but rather than that being a physical creation, I feel that it is the creation of the life force, the soul, which lies within all of us. I feel G-Ds love because G-D, the life force, is with me and within me always.

I hope I have given all a thorough (hopefully not too thorough) understanding of myself. I wish I could ask for specific advice, but having been profoundly secular for so long, I don't even know what questions to ask. I guess, in summary, I want to know how to return to the Covenant of G-D and Man.

New Year New News

So...quite a bit has happened since my last post. Firstly, I've lost around 40lbs and thank god for that. Feeling that I'm still very overweight after dropping the equivalent of a medium sized child makes me realize how bad I had gotten. I still have about 50lbs to go and now that I'm not morbidly obese weight loss has slown substantially. If any of you are trying to slim down, I highly recommend loseit, which is an amazing weight management app.

I've been back to work for some time now, and hope to stay so for more than a few weeks without getting reinjured. My schedule consists entirely of overnights,which means I am involuntary nocturnal. As things have been absurdly busy, I've had very little time to study programming. What little time I have had to study has been put to good use.

Kelly and I moved into a much bigger, much nicer apartment. We're still in Port Washington, but in a more residential part of town. I have a fireplace now, so life is excellent.

Finally!

Things at the Freemason lodge are going splendidly. The lodge room looks great post renovation and I'm doing well in my new position. I've recently written a paper regarding Masonic secrecy, which was received very well in lodge. I'm happy to announce that a version of this paper was read in my favorite podcast: +Whence Came You? . I've gotten wonderful feedback from the reading and this makes me very happy. As the paper is fit for both Masons and non-Masons alike, everyone should feel free to CHECK IT OUT HERE.

As this is something of a reunion post, I won't go in depth into my nerdy goodness,but keep an eye open for comic, guild wars 2, dungeons and dragons, and tech posts in the future... unless I stop posting again.

Lastly, I'm writing this with my new Nexus 7, while also controlling my xBox with the same device. Technology is totally bitchin'. Sadly, I just noticed a faint scratch running vertically down the entirety of the screen and can't stop focusing on it. Guess I'll be taking a trip back to BJ's soon.

From Bikes, To Trains, To Video Games...

So...the other day the wife and I headed to a Toys R Us to pick up a gift for a friends kid. I was actually pretty excited to check it out, as it has been maybe ten years since I visited my former favorite place in the world. I was in and out of Toys R Us so frequently that the staff new my mom by name. Most of the time we didn't get to buy anything but just being there let my imagination run, much like bookstores and comic shops do nowadays.

So, I convince the wife to let me check out the aisles. Knowing full well what was about to happen, she still said yes. This confirms her position as best wife ever.

My Wife Is A Power Ranger And Can Kick Your Wife's Ass.

Holy shit have toys changed. Things have become so much more intricate, and...mature. Sure there are the toys that are made for the kids with lots of money and minimal imagination, but most of the stuff out there is made to let the imagination run wild. Consider that the point of a toy is to be a tool used by the kid, to interface with an imaginary scene played out right in the living room. Or the toy might even be a representation of the kids themselves, friends and family included. If you add the smallest detail to a toy, it increases the scenes and situations that might be imagined exponentially. So when I say that kids have it soooooo much better, I truly mean it.

Holy Crap Awesome!
This armor never existed in this capacity when  I was little.

While browsing (Kelly wouldn't let me buy anything...everything) I came to a realization. Toys are almost entirely related to TV heroes. This wasn't always the case. Sure there were cheesy action figures back in the 60's and 70's but this phenomenon was truly given life in the 80's. Transformers, the 80's cartoon, was developed solely as a way to sell more toys (the cart before the horse). The Real Ghosbusters (my favorite thing ever) allowed the world of the movies to transcend the screen and age group and enter into the living rooms and minds of America's youth. I would actually say that the cartoons are more important than the movies when considered as a pop culture element.

If you consider both of these shows, they both allowed for kids to create and take part in a world way beyond their own. When you got home from school, you could be the mastermind of technologically advanced aliens, or team up with your favorite paranormal investigator and strap on your highly advanced nuclear device to battle supernatural forces. But to play with these things properly, you really had to use your mind. There is no wonder so many nerds view these shows/toys as such instrumental parts of the culture. These toys allowed our minds to fathom actual science disguised as play time. Sure the foundations of the shows/toys have no bearing in actual science, but they do get the mind thinking scientifically.

Even Cats Need A Sick Ride

Thundercats was my first experience with fantasy role playing, well before I even knew that was a thing. Lion-o used the power of loyalty, bravery, and respect of his ancestors to battle his young emotional mind and stay himself from temptation. He did this by battling Mumra, the undead, cold hearted mastermind of evil. The toys of my youth were simple manifestations of these principles.

Mumra: The Evil Mummy of Suck.

Even the simple toys of our youth have been reinvented in a new capacity. It seems that being heroic is popular again. Thank the Deity of your choosing. This is really really good news. The future of our children lies in teaching life lessons in ways that are entertaining to the kids. Allowing this "Light Side" propaganda to permeate their lives is probably a good idea, unless your family is Sith.

Remember how basic legos were? Not anymore.

Jaba's Palace.

Complete With Sarlaac Pit.

If you consider that all of these things I've shown you are things that we nerds absolutely adore, then you'll soon realize two things 1) Nerd Culture is intensely popular, and 2) If nerds are regarded as the intelligent members of our society, then we are raising intelligent children. If we can keep our kids from the idiotic trappings that they find in high school, we can raise an army of nerds! Wait...what...eh whatever.

In seriousness, these toys represent lessons we teach our children. I say we as a society. So when it becomes anything less than cool or awesome to be interested and fascinated in these things, it signals a rejection or reformatting of these lessons. While this laying aside of childish aims can benefit the child and society, they shouldn't ever be forgotten or shunned, lest the lessons they represent be shunned along with them. Humans rely on representation and symbolism to understand the intricate belief system which society and culture consist of. Batman truly is a symbol (and I am Batman).

And Kelly Said My Car Wouldn't Fit Through The Doors...

The resurgence of these geeky things, be they toys or the randomly placed sticker, among the adults of society, bodes well for the future of mankind.

Found In The Mall Parking Garage.

As always, please become a member of the blog and leave your comments and questions.

See If You Can Hit This Retarded Anya Doll..."Yes, I Can Definitely Hit That."

AHHHHH! MINI-POST!

The title of the last post was from the stellar comic book: ATOMIC ROBO. Read it or you suck.

~Warning: What follows is highly geeky DnD talk. Non-Nerds skip to end and/or develop a taste for cool stuff.~

Tonight's game was fantastic. If anybody is looking to play some Dungeons and Dragons with some distant buddies, I highly recommend http://www.rpgtableonline.com. It is still a little buggy but give it some time and patience and you'll grow to love it. The best part is that if you have a DnDInsider account, you can load your characters from the character builder right in. That way you can target, roll to hit, etc. without doing any math whatsoever. Math sucks, use RPGTable.

This post's title comes from one of the drawbacks of RPGTable. Some of the monster tokens didn't work so we had to use this generic Anya Doll (a doll like token of a little girl) as every enemy. We tested targeting...and it worked toward a hilarious result.

A brief summary of the game: We continued where we had left off, in the hold of a pirate ship. We freed the captured wizard, but before we could talk to him, we did a swat team search of the rooms and came upon a bunch of other...anya's. We killed them real good like, then took some loot, had a talk with the friendly wizard, and then....my brother cut off the captains head.

My seemingly well adjusted brother then proceeded to go above decks, throw the head at the foot of the remaining...anya's...and rolled intimidate (he rolled well). They let us into the life boat, but as they could not be brought to justice, they were either to be killed or let free. I couldn't deal with allowing them to possibly continue murder and pillaging (which is what we do...but in a good way) so when we were halfway to shore, i smoked the ship. With a ball of fire. And killed anybody who tried to flee. I swear...I'm completely normal. My mother had me tested.

~End Nerd Talk (Not really but sort of)~

So, what will follow in the coming weeks:

My nerdy thoughts on the RNC.
My nerdy thoughts on Atomic Robo.
My nerdy thoughts on Programming.
My nerdy thoughts on Doctor Who.
My nerdy thoughts about Podcasts.
My nerdy thoughts about SCIENCE!
                AND
My nerdy thoughts on other excellent things (which you should be taking part in but are probably too worried about image to enjoy. Your loss).

I hope you'll enjoy it. It's going to be a fun ride.